Chronic Illness and The Holidays
Chronic illness not only affects the person who suffers but also the family and friends who struggle with watching their loved ones that may have problems at any time and not knowing what they can do to make everyone comfortable.
Living with chronic illnesses makes every day life difficult at times. Changing your own schedule is important when you know if you overdue or have more stress than normal it can cause flares and extra pain.
So during the holidays, when stress and overdoing happens to everyone you need to find ways to make life simpler but you can still have enjoyable and meaningful celebrations.
Although your chronic illness may make some holiday traditions challenging, it doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy your holiday by communicating your limitations, being flexible, and adjusting your expectations, you can help make sure the holidays are happy and memorable not only for you but your loved ones too!
Communicating Your Needs
Let your loved ones know that connecting with them over the holidays is as important as ever to you, but your health is making it hard to plan as usual due to symptoms like difficulty walking, pain, and muscle weakness.
- If you can’t travel, as usual, consider offering to host. Ask others to bring potluck dishes and help clean up so you don’t wind up overdoing it.
- If you usually host the gathering but can’t do it this year, encourage someone else to host instead. They may be delighted to welcome everyone to their home for a change.
- If you always bring a beloved dish, pass the treasured recipe on to a loved one like you would a family heirloom, or shine the limelight on another chef in the family and invite them to bring their favorite dish.
- If you can’t bring yourself to give up the party, think of ways to save time and energy. Use paper plates, plastic flatware, and disposable tablecloths for easy cleanup. Make decorating (or de-decorating) part of the event and get everyone to help. Plan an easy to make meal such as a stop or stew that simmers all day in the crockpot with little prep work or tending to.
- Ask for help decorating your home, or have a craft or cookie night during the holidays.
If it’s just not possible to get together in one place this year, consider using a video chat service such as Skype, Zoom, or FaceTime to have a special holiday call on a smartphone or laptop. During a video chat, you can:
- Watch them open gifts
- Have them show you the decorations around the house, or watch them decorate.
- Read a holiday story or poem to the children, this is hard on them also.
- Sing favorite holiday songs together.
- Join them for dinner, just like you are sitting there with them.
Adjusting Your Expectations
Living with a chronic illness you may need to change the way you celebrate your holidays, but you can still have enjoyable and meaningful celebrations. Although chronic illnesses may make some holiday traditions challenging, it doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy connecting with friends and family during the holiday season.
By communicating you are being flexible, and adjusting your expectations, you can help make sure the holidays are happy and memorable, not only for you but others in your life, who may not know what to do to help. You can’t expect anyone to know what you are going through if you don’t share and communicate what you are going through!Click To Tweet
Letting go of a “perfect” holiday and being flexible can help you keep expectations realistic and focus on what’s most important about the holidays. For many people, that means connecting with loved ones, being thankful for what you have, and finding hope for the new year.
- Accept that your holidays won’t be perfect, this is true for everyone not just those with chronic illnesses and this holiday will be different from celebrations in years past, traditions can be the same just handled differently.
- Focus on what really counts. Finding things to be grateful for, and looking for new ways to connect with loved ones.
- If you find yourself in a conflict with someone over the holidays, take a few breaths before you react. Try to stay compassionate and react with kindness.
- As you reflect on years past, be kind to yourself, and let go of any negativity. As you look forward to next year, make smaller, gradual resolutions or goals rather than ones that will be difficult to achieve.
No matter how hard those of us that suffer from chronic illnesses or pain want to not burden anyone during the holidays, the greatest gift you can give is to ask for help. Allowing others to share their love and compassion with you is a gift for them, and it can make your holidays so much easier and enjoyable for you! Taking time to rest, relax, and to be grateful for the time you can spend with others will always help you to feel better!
I hope that your holidays are filled with joy and love and that you open your heart and mind to finding new ways to make them wonderful!
